Flurry of posting tonight

Tale of two lives

Well I dont know that I want to talk about the one that belongs on Skinemax here in the open. But the other revolves around my kids and interesting enough, my friends kids.

Meeting Jennie and Shawn five years ago had a dramatic change on my life. I was already someone that was used to giving of myself to others but never to the extent that I learned to do so, once accepting them as a part of my life permanently. As I've gone onto other relationships and met new friends and so forth, they have been a constant in my life and I spend time with them anytime I can.



Then there's my friends the Abderrahmans, yeah say that five times slow. They're Syrian and things are a lot different where they're from than here but they are my second family. I've known R since shortly after moving to Atlanta and we've formed a bond that I dont even know how to explain fully. He and his family definitely look at me as family as do I them and when I arrive at their house, their kids look at me like I am uncle which is what they call me. Oh the funny looks I get at daycare..lol.

I think it was in this original blog that I'd posted one time about extreme babysitting. My weeks are anything but what most would consider normal or average for a single 35 y/o male. My schedule has changed somewhat in that now I see my boys on Monday, Wednesdays and Fridays and pick up Ali and Eva on Tuesdays and Thursdays. The Abderrahmans love me so much they usually me to stay in lieu of me going home on the nights I sit for or with them. I read bedtime stories to Ali and watch TV with Donnie on the nights that I see my kids.

The weekends are up for grabs but usually one family or the other will get me one of the two days and I still haven't made enough time for my other close friends from school or home. There just doesn't seem to be enough time in the week, month, year.

But as you can see, I spend the majority of my free time with either my kids or my friends kids which doesn't leave me much time for other people including significant others. One would think that this would/should be a problem for me as it severely limits my ability to find love or give love but it doesn't. If only I could show the emotion to my S.O's that I can to all of my kids, maybe I wouldn't go thru some many romantic trials and tribulations.

Also makes me wonder though, what would/will happen when/if I do settle down. Friends and family is all I've really known my whole life. I've not done the relationship thing much and not been successful at it when I've tried. Could I be happy with my life as it is and that be the problem and if it isn't, can I balance my over committments to my friends and families with a normal loving relationship. Would I even want to try? How easliy those answers come to some yet elude me.