The Phone Call

*ring* *ring* Hello
Jennie: Hey do you have the Wiggles tablecloth I bought for Donnies birthday party last year.
Me: I dont know, I'd have to look
Jennie: Well look when you get home and let me know
Me: ok but I'm outta town this week, wont be back till Friday
Jennie: well that's too late I'll just buy another one *click*

Just a friendly reminder since she knows that I would never forget Donnie's birthday but she's probably not going to let me see him Saturday regardless. This is her form of torture and as much as it hurts me (which accomplishes goal #1), it also hurts the boys. It'll be a full two months since I've seen them this coming sunday. Two months since she yanked Shawn out of his own birthday party and said that I was a bad influence because he saw a picture of me kissing someone who wasn't his mother. We haven't been together as a couple in nearly 3 1/2 years now and somehow a 2 y/o seeing his father figure kissing someone else in a picture is far worse than seeing his mom with her myriad of boyfriends she's had over the last few years.

I tried to talk to her about a permanent custody arrangement but I'm sure if that were to happen, she'd feel like she'd lost some of her bargaining power over me. I was having a pretty decent day up to that phone call. Still, the phone call is something. I could hear donnie in the background going on about something or another and it lifted my spirits just to hear his voice. I'm sure shawn is dying to call me whenever mommie decides that I'm being nice to her again. I think that we're probably not too far away from that or she wouldn't call at all, unless she's sunk to an alltime low in her efforts to punish me for not wanting to be with her romantically. Makes you wonder why I'm not on my knees asking her to marry me huh?

When she's being rational, we have a great time together and we're like a big happy family but to an extent I guess maybe that's the problem. We have too much fun and then she starts thinking that maybe we could work again as a couple.

Well I guess since my day was effectively ruined, I might as well finish reading my book. Sleeping Beauty as a sex slave should probably be more interesting but nonetheless the book is decent.

Meeting Minnie Mouse

Well, I guess if you're not a regular at SurvivorBlows, you're probably thinking I'm off my rocker. Come on now, isnt' she as cute as Minnie. That's none other than our very own JkokoJ (Jen). We had a great lunch today and it was so cool to meet the first peep to ever PM me on the boards. She also technically gave me my first ever sigpic though I dont think it made but on one or two of my posts in the early days. I'm continually amazed at how real and awesome the peeps are on that site. I'm heading into my third full year of being there and still find it interesting and check it nearly every day. That's something I can't say for most the sites or discussion boards I've visited in the past and I attribute it to the great sense of family present on SB and OT in particular. We may not get along with all of our brothers and sisters but we love them each in their own way and when they are down, someone is around to help pick them up. I've met a lot of peeps from the site as I've travelled across the country for work but this one was very special because in many ways her kind first words were the first impression of SB for me and definitely a reason that I kept coming back.

Jen, you're the greatest and I had an awesome time getting to chat with you and hope that we'll get that chance again sometime.

A mouse has to have ears

Another photo of Jen in proper attire ..lol.

Bow Before Me

Your Star Wars Name and Title

Your Star Wars Name: Steha Pacha Your Star Wars Title: Sirvan of Eklis

Your Star Wars Name and Title

Guys and their toys

So here is my toy. She's not the best or the worst on gas but she's just so much fun to drive. I'm thinking about getting my roommate one of the Electronic Collar shock thingies like they have in that one Bud Lite commercial. I swear everytime I go out of town he comes up with some reason that he has to use my baby. I told him when he's got enough sitting in the bank that he can replace her if something happens, that's when he can drive her without consulting me first. I'm actually letting him borrow my other car today and tomorrow as his ex-wife's car broke down and he was nice enough to let her borrow his. Now if only he could get an actual job. I'm not complaining yet cause he hasn't missed a rent payment and as long as he doesn't we're gonna be good by me.

Star Wars baby

So now you know why I was late to work this morning. I'm an uberNerd and just had to make the first showing of the Revenge of the Sith. It was good, some would say great. Hayden Christensen can't act his way out of a paper bag so in my opinion they should have put him in the Black Suit earlier. It would have matched his Stiff performance perfectly.

Tag I'm it

Got another can of paint?
Ok, so Laura got me where others have tried but failed.

"The rules are simple, when you're tagged, choose 5 items from the list to write about. Then tag 3 others… or don't. Whatever.



If I could be a scientist...in a strange way I think I am a scientist. I'm an Engineer, does that count.
If I could be a doctor...
If I could be a painter...
If I could be a gardener...
If I could be a missionary...
If I could be an athlete... I'd like to be one of those swimming dudes cause I can't swim for shit. I always tell people I can swim not to drown and not much else. If I have to swim more than 100 feet I'm screwed.
If I could be a lawyer...
If I could be an innkeeper...I couldn't do this because I would probably have cameras in the rooms and curiousity would get me arrested.
If I could be a writer...
If I could be a llama rider...I didn't know there was such a profession. Is there such a profession? Are there champion race llamas?
If I could be a bonnie pirate...
If I could be an astronaut...
If I could be a world famous blogger...
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world...
If I could be married to any current famous political figure...I dont know why people marry these fools. Maybe I'd marry Hillary, she'll put up with anything. She already has right?


... there ya go... and now for my not-so-lucky tagged victims, I choose:


Tara

Woe

and cq (if she'll ever update her blog.lol)

Open mouth, insert foot

I can even do it with a keyboardth

Just another one of those days when I send an email off to a friend thinking I'm half funny only to realize that I've made a complete ass of myself. I do it all the time whether it be when chatting with someone or sending email. I seem somehow to actually think sometimes before I say stupid shit though. This is why I'm just not that funny. Well I think I may have offended someone and if so, I apologize which brings me to another though....

When do you apologize for something you did that you think is stupid. Do you apologize only if indeed you did offend someone or should you apologize if you feel like an idiot cause you said something you dont think you should have said or did something you dont think you should have done. To an extent I do but I'm an idiot so I dont apologize everytime cause I'd be apologizing all day long. I guess I need to learn to slow down a bit and think before I type too.

Random Thoughts.....

down the line

Silence ~ I always wonder why silence panics me. It's not the silence when I'm with someone. I'm amazingly comfortable with long silences when spending time with friends or loved ones. I talk a lot sometimes but I dont say a whole lot. At least I dont think I do. Which leads me into my next random though.

Boredom ~ I really dont find myself to be all that interesting. I dont think I'm really knocking myself, I just really dont feel that I have that charge that I get from others. I dont think I'm completely boring either but I am just surrounded by people that are way more interesting. I've done interesting things in my life but I can't think of anything recently that would interest the general populace. Should I return to my daredevil ways??? Speaking of which..

Women ~ have always been my weakness. I never really had the daredevil vibe in me but like most men, I will do really stupid things for a cute girl. In retrospect, it's a good thing I'm not gay cause my life really would have been boring if it weren't for some of the stupid things I've done to impress women or get to spend more time with them. I never would have jumped out of a plane if it hadn't been for this and I would have missed out on so much if I hadn't done that. When I was kid all I thought about was getting married and having....

Children ~ I love kids and kids love me, not in the Wacko Jacko sense but I've been babysitting since I was 8 starting in Church. When I was 15 I thought that I would be married with 2.5 kids by the time I was 23 I guess in some form of homage to my heros of the day, my next door neighbors. Yep, I was the typical 15 year old kid in love with the married lady across the street with a little one and Hubby in the service. Ahhh....

Love ~ was so easy back then. It was simple or at least that's how young minds see it. I never really got over my crush(see how quickly love turns to a crush when you're older and wiser) but instead moved on to someone more my own age. Over the years I've had that euphoric feeling on numerous occasions only to find out that it wasn't meant to be. I dont think that speaks to bad luck or really bad choices but to that uncertainty that is true love. I dont know if I'll ever find it and I dont think I'll ever stop looking but at the same time, I know that there will be plenty of heartbreak on both sides of the fence to come

I dont know what triggers the random thoughts in my head but I guess it's part of what makes us human. We're always thinking and wondering and trying to figure out what our meaning or purpose is here on earth. I hope that maybe I'll figure mine out before that fateful day when I take my last breath.

I'm Horny

Reading is Fun(damental)
It happens to everyone right? I mean I'd hate to think that there are people out there that have no sexuality period. But then again to each his or her own.

Well I've been reading this book by Zane "The Sisters of APF". It's so awful, not the book, the book is great but the fact that my ex turned me into a trashy romance novel junkie. It's really hard to call these romance novels though, they're written by a black woman but they're most about sex. For instance, the book that I just finished reading that's got me all worked up. What would you imagine APF stands for? It sounds like a sorority right? Well, it is but these women are the sisters of Alpha Phi Fuckem lol. There's some romance in there too, the main character moves from small town to big city, meets guy and eventually falls for him. But as with all of Zanes novels, there is plenty of sex too and in this one the main character becomes a member of a secret society devoted to making sure women get theirs too instead of just worrying about pleasing their guys. It was a fun read but dam it made me horny.

Now I'm about to start reading a series by Ann Rice writing under her naughty psyuedynym A.N. Roqueluare. Somehow I dont think it's going to make me any less horny. It's not that I mind being horny but when you're not getting any, being horny isn't the greatest thing..lol.

Of Curses and Men

The Stars were out

I was once a cursed man, cursed to forever dream and see only the one. All I can say is that I saw stars. They were all around me and my head swam in pale moonlight. The curse has been lifted. My soul is freed of it's bonds and chains. I am man, hear me roar.

Hard Decisions

Breaking up is hard to do!

Today (well yesterday but it's late) I had to do something that I've not done many times. It was hard, it was emotional but in the end it was the right thing to do. To an extent it wasn't breaking up because I'd been dumped for several weeks by this time but never being one to give up, a part of me had been living by the same rules as when we were actually together.

I'd struggled with my feelings for weeks and thought I'd finally come to some conclusions Thursday. I did some things that sealed my fate that can't be taken back. Friday morning I got a surprise phone call and instinct took over. I snapped back into relationship mode and I shouldn't have because things had already changed too much. Today I did the right thing and freed us both officially.